illmarks

this is what it feels like [CW: illness, body horror illustration]

2024-9-21 Treatment: Meditation Retreat (Zen Sesshin)

The body is light, surrounded by blue denim-colored ink. Around the body in pulsing layers are golden lines. Golden stars of different numbers of points and sizes adorn the background. The body is written in dark blue ink.starting in the head and filling the torso: "my mind and my body are not different. I will attempt a gentle truce"

in the right arm: "may i hear the body's wisdom."

in the left arm: "may I be gentle with myself."

in the legs: "may we be allies in healing."

2024-9-21 Treatment: Meditation Retreat (Zen Sesshin)

An image composed of angled pieces. the bottom angle is of woodchips and plant matter. the next layered angle is a bench with a hand-thrown ceramic mug on it. The final visible angle is my leg, on which a note rests. the note reads "my body & mind are not different. when my mind is confused, my body is too. when my body suffers, my mind is not free. They are both my allies in healing. I am both, and they are both me. While I would not chose the flavor of change, I can work to accept change and the only constant, and with it work to accept the constantly shifting tides & symptoms of my new disability.

Slipped away to write this note to myself during the retreat amongst the evergreen grove, with a mug of oolong tea.

Next Post

Leave a Reply

© 2024 illmarks

Theme by Anders Norén